The other night i was thinking it would be great if i had more hours each day to accomplish things. Then i remembered how when i had a campus "break" my professors would inevitably assign more reading or writing to use that time. I feel that is what life does now--there is always someone who needs or wants just one more thing, and it seems like everyone wants Tuesdays! I get so frustrated, because I find it physically impossible to be everywhere i wish i could at any given hour. I get angry with myself, because in those moments when i realize i cannot be everywhere, i often drop my personal appointments to honor someone else's perceived crisis, whim, or unscheduled question. I get angry because i don't know why it is so difficult for me to exert my boundaries and ask other people to respect my needs. I consider myself fairly "low maintenance" so i resent it that much more when i finally make a choice and then dishonor it by allowing someone or something else to overlap that time, space, or other resource.
I need a scapegoat so i can make excuses until i can simply state my needs.
I need some clones because no one else picks up my responsibilities if i check out, so i need a way to catch up after the meetings, added tasks, and re-dos.
